Parenting by Personality

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

Temperament is a set of in-born traits that a child is born with. Temperament is influenced by genetic and environmental factors and as the child grows up their personality develops and becomes distinctive to that individual. The family and broader environment shape a child’s personality. Personality traits determine how a child interacts with others around them and how they learn about the world around them. Traits appear to remain constant from birth, however traits can be modified through experiences. The personality contains characteristics that are not “good” or “bad” but enduring traits that exist and develop as a child grows and interacts in the world.

A child’s personality can influence the interactions he or she has with others. It may also contribute to how the child is treated by others. It is possible that with the right approach and through education and development certain type of risks associated with some personality traits can be minimised. Personality traits may become apparent through a child’s behaviour and actions. As parents, if we want to modify our child’s instinctive way of being, we need to know early on and what their natural tendencies may be, so we can assist them to tailor their behaviour and traits.

What do you as a parent gain by understanding your child’s personality:

Parents can avoid blaming themselves for issues that may be normal for their child’s personality. Some children are louder or more boisterous than others. Some children are more cuddly or more clingy than others and some are more comfortable with routine or sleep more readily than others.

Parents can know how their child responds to certain situations, you will be able to anticipate and then prepare your child for a situation more efficiently.

Parents can parent proactively not reactively. You will know what your child thinks and what their personality needs are and how to use this knowledge to apply parenting strategies specifically to suit the characteristics or traits of your child’s personality. No more guessing about what your child needs or thinks.

Parents may be able to identify and accept that some behaviour traits are ‘normal’ for their individual child and that certain traits may not be pathological or require treatment.
Parents can understand and appreciate their child more fully and feel more effective as a parent and more in control.

Parents and children with awareness and acceptance of the role personality plays avoid ‘personality conflicts’. Children enjoy a greater sense of who they are and what their potential is when their personality needs are met. Parents can build their child’s self-esteem and encourage them to live true to themselves and less likely to be influenced by others.


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